


Danny Boye and the World's Greatest Love Machine

by hazuki_15



Category: Room Interiors (Anthropomorphic)
Genre: Boys In Love, Deliberate Badfic, Everyone Is Gay, M/M, everyone's names are so long I can't be bothered to type them and the pairings they're in all out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-19
Updated: 2016-03-19
Packaged: 2018-05-27 15:38:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6290215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hazuki_15/pseuds/hazuki_15
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Room Interiors (Anthropomorphic) is a very tragically underappreciated and underacknowledged canon. Because it is a fandom of one I'm copying and pasting the list of characters from the tag set of Bad Bang 4 in hopes that some people will be inspired to turn it to a fandom of twenty.</p><p>The Back Wall That Is Always Looking at the Front Wall<br/>The Bed That Keeps Blocking the Ceiling's View of the Floor<br/>The Ceiling That Is Always Looking Out for the Floor<br/>The Chair That Is Always There for the Desk No Matter What<br/>The Closet That the Owner has Moved Into for the Forseeable Future<br/>The Desk That Just Wants the Textbook Back<br/>The Door That Keeps Hitting On the Left Wall<br/>The Floor That Doesn't Know Why It Keeps Looking at the Ceiling<br/>The Front Wall Whose Love with the Back Wall Is Not Meant to Be<br/>The Laptop That Has Intense Encounters with the Window<br/>The Left Wall That Just Wants to Be Left Alone<br/>The Light Switch That the Owner Turned on and Left Hanging<br/>The Light That the Ceiling Made Take its Last Name JUST TO MAKE THE FLOOR JEALOUS<br/>The Monster Under the Bed That's Too Busy Shipping Things to Scare the Owner<br/>The Right Wall That Wants Something More with the Back Wall<br/>The Textbook That Keeps Throwing Itself at the Left Wall<br/>The Window Ledge That Agrees with Everything the Ceiling Light Says<br/>The Window That Uses the Laptop as a Substitute for the Tree on the Front Lawn</p>
    </blockquote>





	Danny Boye and the World's Greatest Love Machine

**Author's Note:**

> Room Interiors (Anthropomorphic) is a very tragically underappreciated and underacknowledged canon. Because it is a fandom of one I'm copying and pasting the list of characters from the tag set of Bad Bang 4 in hopes that some people will be inspired to turn it to a fandom of twenty.
> 
> The Back Wall That Is Always Looking at the Front Wall  
> The Bed That Keeps Blocking the Ceiling's View of the Floor  
> The Ceiling That Is Always Looking Out for the Floor  
> The Chair That Is Always There for the Desk No Matter What  
> The Closet That the Owner has Moved Into for the Forseeable Future  
> The Desk That Just Wants the Textbook Back  
> The Door That Keeps Hitting On the Left Wall  
> The Floor That Doesn't Know Why It Keeps Looking at the Ceiling  
> The Front Wall Whose Love with the Back Wall Is Not Meant to Be  
> The Laptop That Has Intense Encounters with the Window  
> The Left Wall That Just Wants to Be Left Alone  
> The Light Switch That the Owner Turned on and Left Hanging  
> The Light That the Ceiling Made Take its Last Name JUST TO MAKE THE FLOOR JEALOUS  
> The Monster Under the Bed That's Too Busy Shipping Things to Scare the Owner  
> The Right Wall That Wants Something More with the Back Wall  
> The Textbook That Keeps Throwing Itself at the Left Wall  
> The Window Ledge That Agrees with Everything the Ceiling Light Says  
> The Window That Uses the Laptop as a Substitute for the Tree on the Front Lawn

Danny Boye's room was a very special place. The room was a place where magic happened. The magic of _**love**_.

Danny Boye's room was the world' greatest love machine.

The Back Wall That Is Always Looking At The Front Wall, like his name suggested, was always looking at The Front Wall Whose Love (o sorrows of sorrows) With The Back Wall Is Not Meant To Be. Their love was not meant to be, because they were on opposite sides of the room, so while they couldn't consummate their love, they could feed the flames of their love by always looking at each other. Their heated gazes were noticed by The Right Wall That Wants Something More with the Back Wall, but could only stand by and look, helplessly aroused by the fire in the Right Wall's eyes.

The Left Wall That Just Wants To Be Left Alone wanted to be left alone because he was too beautiful, too attractive for this world. There were two inhabitants of Danny Boye's room vying for his precious basket of love. The first was The Door That Keeps Hitting On the Left Wall, who like his name suggested, kept hitting on the Left Wall by going in for a passionate embrace. The second was The Textbook That Keeps Throwing Itself at the Left Wall, who like his name suggested, kept throwing himself at the Left Wall in the hopes that their sudden episodes of full on intimacy would make him a winner in the Left Wall's eyes. The winner of his _**love.**_

The Floor That Doesn't Know Why It Keeps Looking at the Ceiling, like his name suggested, kept finding himself looking at The Ceiling That Is Always Looking Out for the Floor no matter what he did. The Ceiling could only look back at the Floor, like a hopelessly besotted boy in love, whenever he got the chance, which was not as often as he liked because of The Bed That Keeps Blocking the Ceiling's View of the Floor, who like his name suggested, kept blocking the Ceiling's view of the Floor, in a silent plea for the Ceiling to look at him with those warm sunny eyes of love instead. So sexually frustrated by the Floor's worldly innocence that the Ceiling engaged the The Light That (like his hame suggested) the Ceiling Made Take its Last Name JUST TO MAKE THE FLOOR JEALOUS in a pretend commonlaw relationship, out of a desire for the Floor to at long last realize who was it that he wanted to call his _**love.**_

The Desk That Just Wants the Textbook Back, like his name suggested, was in an anguished unrequited love with the Textbook, who (o sorrows of sorrows) was himself in seemingly or seemingly not unrequited love with the Left Wall. So preoccupied was the Desk with the Textbook that he was inpervious to the timid blushing virgin glances of The Chair That Is Always There for the Desk No Matter What, who like his name suggested, was always there right beside the Desk, for the Desk.

The Laptop That Has Intense Encounters with the Window, like his name suggested, had intense lustfilled encounters with The Window That (o sorrows of sorrows) Uses the Laptop as a Substitute for the Tree on the Front Lawn. Although the Window, like his name suggested, was using the Laptop as a stand in lover for the object of his love, the Tree on the Front Lawn, their scorchingly hot encounters in the sack was still enough to leave him satisfied, sexually.

And then there was Danny Boye.

Danny Boye, who was so deep in The Closet That (like his name suggested) the Owner has Moved Into for the Foreseeable Future he was releasing homoerotic pheromones everywhere in the room, particularly The Light Switch That (like his name suggested) the Owner Turned on and Left Hanging. So often was Danny Boye in the Closet's dark embrace every night that the Light Switch could only growl lowly at the sight of their object of love being so close, yet so far.

Danny Boye, who was emitting such large amounts of pheromones that The Monster Under the Bed That's (like his name suggested) Too Busy Shipping Things to Scare the Owner forgot his preoccupation with shipping all the things, and scared the owner every day. The Monster scared Danny Boye not in the traditional manner that was characteristic of monsters under beds, but by wrapping himself around Danny Boye, and slamming him with full force into the door of the Closet, then again and again with even more intense fervor, pounding into Danny Boye who wriggled and moaned arousedly and gasped, all the way to a screaming orgasm.

Danny Boye tried to keep his homoeroticism in check whenever he left the room, but they knew. The inhabitants of the room, including Danny Boye himself, knew that he was a slave to boy on boy _**love**_.


End file.
